Overtime Outrage
Season 1, Episode 9
Eddie shares how COVID impacted his job doing crisis work in a community mental health agency. With coverage being low, they offered overtime as an incentive to cover shifts only for them to turn around and tell him that he wouldn't be paid for overtime! We hear how he navigated working in the pandemic, deciding to leave his job, and knowing his worth.
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Episode Transcript - Overtime Outrage
Allie Joy 00:00
Kathryn Esquer 00:12
Our mission on Am I a Bad Therapist is to normalize and humanize our existence as therapists. You can help us spread this message by subscribing and leaving us a review wherever you are right now. Whether that's YouTube, Apple, podcasts, Spotify, Stitcher, you know the drill. You can also help us by sharing Am I a Bad Therapist with your network. Whether it's on social media, your stories, or just between colleagues, every listener helps us make a difference in this field, and we will always reshare if you tag us.
Allie Joy 01:34
If you're listening to the podcast, make sure to check out our pretty faces on our YouTube channel.
Kathryn Esquer 01:38
And if you're watching us on YouTube, make sure to head over to our podcast and leave a review. You can find all of our links in the notes below.
Allie Joy 01:46
We pick a few lucky five star reviewers to shout out and invite for a 15 minute consultation with the both of us to talk about anything on your mind. From clinical work to podcasting we're game, just make sure to leave us your name and location in the review. Hey, Kathryn, where were you working when the pandemic hit?
Kathryn Esquer 02:09
I was actually in office integrated primary care doing all in person sessions and had to literally overnight transition to all telehealth. While my coworkers were literally on the front lines because it was primary care doing all the testing. It was a wild ride.
Allie Joy 02:30
Oh my gosh, I can't even imagine how challenging that was.
Kathryn Esquer 02:34
I mean, I got out of it unscathed. I feel for my co workers. That's more where my heart lied. But where were you? Where were you working?
Allie Joy 02:42
So I was actually in private practice for myself and I was in person but I transitioned to telehealth, but it got me thinking, because I used to work in community mental health, as we talked about in episode seven. But I couldn't help but reflect and wonder how the heck I could have worked in community mental health in the pandemic, and it made me think of all of our colleagues who are doing community mental health. And just, I can't even still can't even imagine how it was navigated.
Kathryn Esquer 03:12
I know that's why I was excited when Eddie reached out to us to join us on am I a bad therapist because he was in community mental health not only in community mental health during the pandemic, but he was in the crisis unit. And he is going to share with us about how he handled it, and also how his organization handled it and how that missfit between the two maybe made him question his value as a therapist.
Allie Joy 03:37
Yeah, it's a good one. I hope you guys are ready.
Kathryn Esquer 03:41
Yes. And before we get started, just a friendly reminder that everything we say here is for entertainment purposes and not a substitute for therapy, ethical guidance or clinical consultations.
Allie Joy 03:51
All right. Well, this is episode number nine of Am I a Bad Therapist. Let's get into it.
Kathryn Esquer 04:00
Well, hey, Eddie, welcome to Am I a Bad Therapist.
Eddie Carrillo 04:05
Thank you. I'm excited.
Kathryn Esquer 04:09
So before we hear about why you're a bad therapist, why don't you tell us a little bit about yourself your practice how you got to where you're at today?
Eddie Carrillo 04:17
Well, there's a ton of reasons why I'm a bad therapist. But yeah, we will. I'll tell you guys about me first. I am currently in Oregon. I'm originally from the San Jose Bay Area in California. I've been in Oregon now for I think this year is going to be like 12 years. So it's been a long time at this point. Like I drive a Subaru. I have my Oregon license like I'm, I think I'm an Oregonian at this point. But yeah, I'm a licensed, licensed professional counselor in Oregon. I actually work at a high school. My official title is mental health specialist. I just tell people in the school therapist, there's not a whole I think when I when I started last fall, I showed up to like new staff orientation and even like the Director of Student Services was like, we're so happy you're here. We don't exactly know what you're doing. But we're just glad you're here. And I'm like, I think I'm glad I'm here to like, well, I guess we'll figure it out. So yeah, that's a little bit about me.
Allie Joy 05:15
That's, that's so funny. I mean, I'm going off on a tangent before we even get started. I was actually also, school based therapist as well, before I was in private practice, and the exact same thing happened to me, they were like, this is really great. You're here with a school based health center. But we don't really know what you do. So I feel like it's not just an Oregon, it happens in Connecticut, apparently, too. And it's good. It's great place to be, but no one knows what you do.
Eddie Carrillo 05:42
Yeah, it's I mean, I think it's really cool. And I think anytime I tell anybody, like, Oh, I'm a therapist at a high school, I get like, nine times out of 10 is the same reaction of like, Oh, that's so great. Like, it's so needed, but then like, not a whole lot of people know of like, how it actually like, fits like the education world is so different from the mental health world. Yeah, there's a lot of overlap, but it's just so different. And like trying to make it fit when you're like cramming into a five class or six class schedule, with like, periods and like different lunches and like, it's just a lot, but yes, I'm glad you get it.
Allie Joy 06:19
Yeah. And I feel like we we have to ask you to give us a plug because you're a podcaster, too!
Eddie Carrillo 06:25
Yeah, thank you guys for for the opportunity. Yeah, so I am the therapist half of a show called Millennial Mental Health Channel. My co host, Justin is a psychiatrist who's currently doing his fellowship in Nebraska. I don't want to like butcher it and say, Where exactly is that, but he's, he's a child and adolescent psychiatrist and training. Yeah, we've been doing our show since November 2019. It's been a lot of fun. We really enjoy it. And honestly, I feel like I just It keeps me learning without having to do like, boring continuing education stuff like I can learn, like in a more fun or a funner way. I don't know the right way to say it, but in a more entertaining way. So yeah, thank you guys for letting me plug it.
Kathryn Esquer 07:09
Absolutely. And I completely agree with you this. The show keeps us on our toes.
Eddie Carrillo 07:15
Yeah, I feel like I have to keep learning. Yeah, exactly. In the best way. It doesn't feel like a chore, which I think is cool.
Kathryn Esquer 07:22
Yeah. So Eddie, were dying to know you're a podcaster, you're a therapist, you work with high schoolers. This could go in any number of different directions. So tell us why. What story would you like to share with us today about why you're a bad therapist?
Eddie Carrillo 07:38
Yeah, um, well, I think we're gonna take it back a little bit. It's not that far. March 2020. As you guys are well aware, in any listeners, well aware, the world kind of shut down. And I think it was, things were kind of creeping in that direction. I remember in February, I went to, like a bachelor party and I went to Hawaii. And in those times, like people were kind of talking like, Oh, what is this? This COVID thing happening? Like, what, you know what, we don't know anything about it. Let's just live our life. Finally, in March, I think I remember I used to work in a community mental health clinic, which I think you guys are well aware of community mental health, it's its own thing. I worked there for at that point, I was going on to my third year. I remember coming home from work one day, and just I got the notification. I think one of the NBA basketball games got canceled. And that's when I kind of knew like things were, we're not okay, professional sports, like they do everything in their power to not cancel things. There's a lot of money to be made and a lot of money to be missing if they're going to do that. So I knew something was wrong. I went to work the next day. I remember we met in this big like, conference room that we had, but we're all very like, spread out like just the whole like six feet thing. And at that point, like slowly but surely, like things started to kind of like fall apart. At the community mental health clinic, I was on the crisis team. So that was its own thing. I would either go I would go to like the juvenile detention center, work with walking crisis that came in for the day. Sometimes we would go to the hospitals in the community and just do mental health screenings in the emergency department. And what we did was during the week, like Monday through Friday, we handled the ones from eight to five o'clock. After hours, we contracted with the local university and their city students, and they would take over after hours and over the weekend. But because the world was starting to shut down, all those students went back home, they pretty much were told to leave campus and there was a big gap of like, however many hours that needed to be covered every day in terms of like after hours crisis. So the clinic was scrambling. The adult clinic was scrambling and they didn't know what to do. Eventually they just said hey, we need help. If anybody is available, please consider trying to cover these shifts, whether it's the weekend whether it's late night, even if you can only do like four hours at a time. Please consider it And then and then to make it more desirable. They said, we'll pay you overtime, like, whatever we have to do, like, let's make it happen. So me being, how old was I at the time, 27, I heard more money. And I knew at that point, like, I wasn't going to be seeing my girlfriend for a little bit, she was living in Southern Oregon at the time, we're gonna need to keep our distance, right? So I was like, well, if I'm gonna be working, and I need to be away from her, I might as well make as much money as I can, like, this is a great idea. So I took it upon myself to volunteer to cover a bunch of shifts, whatever it took, I didn't really care. I lived in town, too. So it was like a five minute drive to work every day, a 15 minute drive to the other hospital. And then the first hospital in town was was very close. So to me, I thought it was a great opportunity to make more money and do that because community mental health, the paychecks were not, were not great. So I did that I sign up for a bunch. And then I think I was like two to three weeks into it. And I got my supervisor came into my office, it was like, hey, you know, thanks for covering all of Saturday, like, thanks for being on call for 10 hours. We need you to take tomorrow off. Because we don't want to pay you overtime. And I was like, Well, hold on. Like, no, first off. Second. You guys told me like you guys could do this, you know, and we got into it. We ended up meeting with like the clinic manager. And I was very firm. I'm like, No, like you told me I could do this, you told me I could get overtime. There's even like emails of like, yeah, you guys can wait at home and have your cell phone and you can watch Netflix and do this and that. And as long as you're on call. That's all that matters. And then they they quickly backtracked. And from there was kind of the beginning of the end of my time at the clinic. Because at that point, I was like, if I could, like, do this huge favor for the clinic, and then you're gonna backtrack and make it seem like I'm doing something wrong, then I don't think I want to be here anymore.
Allie Joy 12:02
Wow.
Kathryn Esquer 12:04
Yeah.
Allie Joy 12:07
Oh, I was just saying it almost feels like a slap in the face of like, the world is chaotic. You know, I mean, still, but especially at that point. Yeah. And you're going out of your way. And for them to backtrack that just I can't even imagine how he felt.
Eddie Carrillo 12:20
Yeah, like the, the biggest slap in the face. Yeah, I felt and I just remember sitting in, like, in my office and my supervisor trying to like convince me, like, pretty much like begging me like, Please, can you take tomorrow off, to not have to pay overtime? And I'm just like, no, like, why would I? I and I remember I that day, that same day after we talked it over and they're like, Fine, we'll pay you overtime. But moving forward, like we can't, I emailed out to the whole, like, crisis team group, people that agreed to take shifts, and I said, Hey, just so everybody knows, I took my name off of, you know, this many shifts, I'm not going to be covering anymore. Thank you. And I remember the adult team supervisor emailing me back and saying, Well, if you ever find that you need extra work to do, like, please feel free to pick up shifts again. And I was just like, No, thanks. I'm fine. I have enough work to do. But sure.
Kathryn Esquer 13:14
Yeah, how did it feel to pull back to to go back on? I mean, they went back on their commitment first, but then that made you go back on your commitment to cover in shifts when it sounds like you were a gung ho team player. And then suddenly, no one was on your side. So you're saying see, what was that like?
Eddie Carrillo 13:32
Yeah, I mean, I think a little piece of me or maybe a bigger piece, like felt bad about it. Like, I think any therapist that that's in it, for the right reasons, is gonna have some type of way, feeling of like, I feel bad. But and when I said, I feel like this is the beginning of the end of my time there. That's what I started to think of, like, like nobody in the grand scheme of things besides me. And like, I guess my friends or family and my, my girlfriend, like, nobody cares about me in this job, like, more than just like, as long as I get my stuff done, cool, they care about me. But I started to realize, like, if I quit next week, like, the only thing that's gonna happen is they're just gonna post my job again, and they'll need to find somebody else. So at that point, it really made me think I'm like, Well, if there's the biggest disaster going on in the world, and I'm willing to help out and be like you said, a team player, and then they're just gonna, like, throw it all away, then like, I don't, I don't want to be around these people like, I just don't want to be here.
Allie Joy 14:34
Yeah, that makes sense. And I will say, I, it's so interesting. When you started talking about COVID and community mental health. I thought initially that this was going to be about like, you had to go into homes and COVID. And, you know, I'm glad that there's another perspective but I am curious of how did they handle, you know, safety of you going into the community being around people and still working when so many people transition to telehealth during that time, what was that like for you without another layer upon this?
Eddie Carrillo 15:05
They handled it very poorly. They their way of handling, it was, okay, we need to limit the amount of people in the clinic. So if you're not going to be in the clinic, you can work from home. If you're going to work from home, here is this Excel spreadsheet that we just made, we need you to type in what you're doing every 30 minutes. And then we need you to send it into your your supervisor every day, just so we can track what you're doing throughout the day. So the loophole I guess around that was if I show up to the clinic, and I keep my door closed, and I don't talk to anybody for 10 hours, I don't have to prove that I'm working. But if I stay home, and try to be safe, and limit interactions with other people, I have to prove that I'm working. So it was a very poor system. A lot of people were upset by it, me included. So I just showed up to work every day. And I sat in my office, I actually bought a Nintendo Switch, like right when this was going on. And I would just play my switch because there was no clients were coming in. At the time, it was like, Okay, it's what was it like two weeks, right to flatten the curve, and then we'll kind of go from there. So everyone's like, Oh, just call me in two weeks, and we'll set up another appointment, we'll figure it out from there, or, you know, two weeks rolls by a month, month and a half. And it's like, nobody wants to come in person. It's convenient mental health clinics. So you know, I loved working with the population I was working with, but not everybody had access to, at the time reliable internet, a device that had a camera. Doing phone sessions, as you guys are probably well aware is awful. I actually don't even I don't like virtual sessions anyway. So it was just a hard time for me. So yeah, I the way around, it was I would just show up and sit in my office and I had a couch. So I'd sit on the couch and play my switch. And I guess if they needed to need me to prove that I was working, then I would just show up every day. But it was it was a big, it was a big issue. There was that there was as far as PPE, I think they gave us like one mask. And then that was kind of it. But at the time. I also remember like the hospitals and doctors offices, they needed to be the ones that had all the PPE. So that was that was understandable. But like that, yeah, there was not a whole lot of like, we're here for you, we're supporting you like it was very much the the opposite at the beginning. And it made it really hard. And it really also showed me like, my favorite part of my job. And I was I was more than willing to I had it in my, what my five year plan or whatever, that I was going to be there for an extended period of time. I really liked my clients really liked my co workers, I was working fous 10's. So I had a three day weekend, every week, community mental health for what it lacks and pay, the benefits were great. Like there's just a lot of really positive things that I enjoyed. But as soon as my clients and my co workers got taken away, that's what I was like, Yeah, this is, this is kind of it. I'm not, I am not happy.
Kathryn Esquer 18:06
So here you are, in a crisis community mental health crisis unit, and the pandemic hits. They're saying we need coverage. You're saying I love this work. I love my clients. And I could also use some extra money. I'm showing up as a team player working as many hours as I can serving the patients ready? How about those ready to serve the patients? Yeah. But then the organizational structure and leadership doesn't support you actually seeing the patients and or compensating you for your time spent covering shifts. So you're saying, Hey, I'm ready to go, I'm a good therapist, look at me, I'm ready to go. But the environment you are in didn't allow you to actually do the work and do do what you love, right? Or even reward you for that or even compensate you for that. I shouldn't even say reward just compensate.
Eddie Carrillo 18:59
Yeah, and it made it when eventually I think they got enough complaints on like, Okay, fine. You can work from home, and you don't have to, like send in your timesheet. And then at that point, I was like, you know, there'd be I would be at home, I think a couple of days a week. And it was just hard. Like, you know, the clients didn't want to talk. I didn't want to talk like I'm, I'm trying to bear the brunt of like, this pandemic for myself, like the pandemic for myself and try and take care of myself. Like I wasn't coping very well. So it was just it was a tough time. And I think at that point, I was like, Okay, this is not this is not fun anymore. Like I just there was a period of time I was like, I just don't I'm not sure what I want to do now. But working here is not ideal anymore. And it's like too, because like I said I had like a five minute commute to work. And I don't know if I'll ever be able to beat that. Again. Like that was the only issue was I did show up late more. The closer I live than when I lived 45 minutes away. I was always early 45 minutes away. Five minutes away. I was like walking in like 802 to like the crisis team meeting, like, Hey, guys, nope, I didn't just get here. I had to run to my car and grab something for the third day in a row. So yeah, it was. It was a mess at that point.
Kathryn Esquer 20:15
Let's pause here for a quick ad break.
Allie Joy 20:18
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Kathryn Esquer 20:47
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Allie Joy 21:09
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Kathryn Esquer 21:12
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Allie Joy 21:24
Yeah, okay. So what happened then? So they told you, like we said that you couldn't do the overtime or they wouldn't pay you the overtime, you send out that email. What happened next?
Eddie Carrillo 21:38
Yeah, I tried to just do telehealth stuff with the clients that I did have, you know, at that time, being on the crisis team, when our supervisor would like, lay out your hours, like your your billable hours of like, this is how this is how many clients you should have compared to your crisis work. I was always because I did so much crisis work. Really, I was only supposed to have like 20 clients, but I had like 40, because it's community mental health. That's just how it works. So I was trying to work with my clients, because a lot of them because they were dealing with their own issues. Were just like, this is not the right time. This is too difficult. I completely understood. At that point, I was just like, well, I don't know, I don't know what else to do. I guess I'll just kind of do the best that I can. And the hard part was, I had a I think I mentioned before started recording I was there wasn't too much client stuff. But there was one situation where I had a client who was really struggling at home and was was no longer going to be in that foster home that he was in. And there'll be a couple of times during that that three to four month period where I was still there before I left were on like a Friday were had the day off. I would say hey to the team, though the wraparound team, hey, if you need me, you know, this is really important. Like just let me know. And I can support in whatever way possible. There was one time where we took the client out to eat, just because we wanted to be with him for a little bit. And it didn't even need to be therapeutic. We just wanted to take them to eat. And somebody found out my supervisor found out that on a Friday, for an hour and a half, I had a burrito with a client. And they actually got upset with me because they said I didn't ask for this was overtime again. I was like I didn't ask to have overtime approved. And I told him directly. I was like, why don't want to get paid for that I was I was just eating like, it doesn't matter. I just wanted to see this client and make sure they're okay. So that happened. And then like two months later, similar situation where on a Friday, crap was hitting the fan. The team needed me at least for just some consultation, I stepped in, we talked it over whatever it was, my supervisor found out again. And then my manager hit me with what is it called, it's called like a letter of instruction. Basically the precursor to being like formally written up. And it was basically telling me like, you're being written up, because on multiple occasions, you have done work outside of your working timeframe. And that's not okay. So even more so like I was the burrito the damn burrito, like even more. So like I was willing to go above and beyond in the middle of like the world on fire. And my job was not happy about that. And I remember at that point that was kind of like it said, like, I didn't want to work there anymore. But that was like it. That was like the last straw. I was very petty about it. I printed out the letter of instruction. I taped it to my door. So whatever coworkers were in the clinic could see it. And I was very like, just vocal of like, this is not okay, I'm not happy about this. You are telling me that you're going to be upset with me because I'm doing extra work. And this for this is now the second or third time in the last three months that I'm willing to do these extra things and be there for my clients. But now you want me to be in trouble. So yeah, it was not a good final three months.
Kathryn Esquer 24:49
Wow. So they're saying we need coverage. We need extra work. Wait, we're not going to pay you. Oh, you're gonna do it for free. Now we're gonna write you up.
Eddie Carrillo 24:59
Yep. Yeah.
Kathryn Esquer 25:01
So this is a really interesting situation where it sounds like upon reflection, you're able to say I showed up in the best way I could as a therapist, but my environment actually didn't let me be a good therapist. But I wonder when you were going through it, did you did the environment make you question whether you were a bad therapist or not?
Eddie Carrillo 25:25
I think that it made me question if I was like, a bad person, like it was really, it was hard for me like it was it was tough. And like, I think that is when we talk about burnout, right? In our professional lot. Like, it's probably not talked about enough in school and in training, but it gets brought up once in a while. And the same people that are telling you to take care of yourselves are the same people that are kind of the reason why therapists are getting burnt out in certain agencies. Yeah, and at that time, I was just like, really questioning like, Am I doing something wrong? Am I the issue? Like, am I the problem? Like, do I need to like, stop? And do I need to just like, shut up and put my head down? Like, what what is happening? And that's when I really started to think like, I think this is I think this is the what the people call burnout. Like, I think this is it. Like, I don't know if this I think this is it. I think this is the first time I'm experiencing this. And it really got to the point where like, my alarm would go off in the morning. And I would just, I was already saying, like I was I was already kind of showing up late, even though it's five minutes away. But I was like, really showing up late, like, I was like not I had the hardest time getting out of bed. There was multiple times where like the morning of like, 804, I would just send an email, say, Hey, I'm not coming in today, or like I'm taking the day off like I was, it was tough. It was really making me question like, I guess like, what is life? Like? What is the point of all this? Like, I can't? I don't know. Like, this is not I can't get out of bed for this anymore. Like, I just don't know. I don't know what to do.
Allie Joy 26:55
Yeah, well, that's so valid, that it makes so much sense. Because like, you're saying, you know, you're loving the work that you do. But that had gotten stripped back so far. And then the environment was challenging. They weren't necessarily being as supportive as they could. Why would you want to come in? So I feel like I would be right there with you. Yeah.
Eddie Carrillo 27:13
Yeah, I think it was hard to is like, yeah, my coworkers got taken away. So I had like nobody to talk to at work. And we're, um, I very much enjoy the collaboration that is like any type of mental health job that I've had, where it's like, Hey, do you have a couple minutes, like, let me walk in your office, let's talk for a little bit. And that guy, like, completely taken away. So at that point, I was just like, Man, I'm by myself, I don't know. I don't know who to turn to. And I don't know who to ask, you know, I have my support people and the people that love me and take care of me. But really, like, they don't always fully understand what it is like how the work can drain you in a particular way, you know, compared to their job. So it is hard to like, talk about that kind of stuff with people that like aren't in the job. Just because they don't get it and not because they don't want to get it, they just don't have that experience of like, eight clients in a row with five minutes each to do the know, and then trying to get all the notes done. Because if you don't, then it's gonna add to the 15 other notes that you haven't signed off in time. And if you don't sign those oftentimes, and the little like tab on your electronic health records is going to turn red. And anytime it turns red, it stresses me out because it's everything is late. So it's just like there's it's just a different world that unless you're like in it, and I'm sure it's the same with other professions, they probably say the same thing. Like unless you're in it, you don't fully understand the stress of it. But yeah, I felt like I was I was by myself.
Kathryn Esquer 28:38
You recognized change needed to happen for you. Sounds like you also recognized I need to get myself out of this environment. Yeah. What where do you go? What do you do? What was your next step?
Eddie Carrillo 28:50
Well, at that point, I was like, worried because I was, you know, wasn't fully licensed yet. I was like, maybe like two months away from being licensed three months away. And I was like, looking for jobs. And at the time, like a lot of jobs were saying, like, licensed or almost, and I for me, I was like, Well, I don't know if I want to go through the hassle of like, changing jobs than having to find a new supervisor, because the clinic provided me one. And like, how's that whole transition, excuse me gonna go. And eventually, I said, Whatever, I'm just gonna apply to these jobs, see what happens. And actually got a couple of interviews pretty quickly, like at a hospital, like a pretty big hospital system up here. And the one that was full time, it was like ready to offer me a job, which I probably should have seen as, potentially a red flag at the time, but I needed to get out was a Partial Hospitalization and Intensive Outpatient eating disorder program. And I'd never I don't remember ever talking about eating disorders in school. I probably heard the term eating disorder at work like three times. So I had zero like zero experience, but at that point, I was like, I will take whatever I can get. When the future manager was on the phone asking me like, are you interested in this population? I was very sincere and like, I have no clue. But I want to learn, I have no issue learning, and I'm very open to it. But yeah, I just said, like, what in my head, I'm like, whatever it takes to get out, like, let me just get out. And they offered it to me pretty quick. And I just, I put in my 13 day notice, I don't think it was a full two weeks, I think I did it on a Monday and then like, not the next Friday, but the Friday after that was gonna be my last or Thursday after that was gonna be my last day. And I was just like, and on top of that it was an hour commute each way. And then that's how badly I needed to leave. And the pay was a lot better. But it needed to leave that badly that I was willing to drive an hour into Portland area. Just to get out of there.
Allie Joy 30:50
Wow. So what lesson do you feel like our listeners, like could gather from this? Or what would you say to someone who was experiencing something very similar?
Eddie Carrillo 31:01
Yeah, I think it's that and I wish like I had the attitude that I have now, maybe not all the attitude that I have now that I did back, like back then is that like, you have to be your like, number one fan, and you have to be your number one advocate. Because if you're not like nobody else is going to be like no one else is going to tell you like no one in the organization that you're in, if you're struggling there, no one there is going to tell you, Oh, maybe you should find another job. Because 99, I'm making that number up, but 99% of like, agencies and organizations mental health wise, like need you to stay there. So they're not going to tell you like maybe it's time for you to leave, they're gonna say what they're gonna want to come up with, like, what can we do to make you happy now? And then you can deal with it later? So really, yeah, I would tell any new clinician, older clinician clinician somewhere in the middle, like, I think you have to be your number one fan, and you have to be your number one advocate. And you have to like I think, to just like know, your worth, like you don't have to be dealing with that kind of stuff. Unfortunately, like community mental health is built upon, like new grads and people who want to be licensed like we we did not have that many people that were there for that long. And that's like across the board and like across the country with community mental health. So it's it's knowing like, what is your level of like, BS that I can put up with? How much am I willing to push that that level? A little bit? And then at what point do I know like, this is it I don't need to deal with that anymore? I think that was the biggest thing. Because now like if anything goes sideways, and even with the hospital job and my current job, anytime anything goes sideways in my head, I'm like, I could find a new job in two weeks. This is fine. Let me let me just let me see what I'm willing to put up with. It's not worth it anymore, I could find a new job pretty quickly. But yeah, I would be that advocate for yourself, you're worth it.
Kathryn Esquer 32:56
That and also, I think you're highlighting the scarcity mentality that we feel like we can't get another job, or there's no other jobs out there. And to further build upon that, it's that, you know, it sounds like you took this community mental health job and you liked it, it was going well. And there was a pretty clear switch that happened with the pandemic. But for those of us in positions, now the shifts or the switch in our environments might be gradual, but our environments do change and what might be was a good fit at one point in your career or in the world around you might not be a good fit later on. And to not embrace that scarcity mentality that this is the only thing or this is my only option is is incredibly brave and also needed to be able to advocate for yourself.
Allie Joy 33:49
Yes, definitely.
Eddie Carrillo 33:52
No, no, I was just gonna say it's tough because another piece I forgot to mention this earlier, but I'm also an adjunct faculty at the school that I went to for my master's and I tell a lot of the students that like this was just not talked about, like when I was in school, like I don't I don't know why or how we I know how we can fix it, but I just don't know why. It just wasn't talked about like Job preparedness outside of like, doing progress notes and intake assessments and ongoing therapy. Like that gets talked about enough but like the job preparedness of like, what is it what are the needs that you want to be met? Like what do you want to go to a job like what is important when you're looking for a job what is important like when you have the job and what is important for you if you want to keep the job or find something else like that's just never talked about? So I tell the students all the time like yeah, it's especially now I think there's I looked at the job that I used to have I looked at the posting and I showed it to my class and like this job now pays X amount money more than when I first had it like you there's there's a ton of jobs out there like you guys will be fine. And I tell the students like please Be picky. Please do not just settle for a job because I think you all will have a much better opportunity than I did. You know, five years ago when I first graduated, like you will have multiple opportunities and places to look for work and you don't need to just settle.
Kathryn Esquer 35:19
Excellent advice.
Allie Joy 35:20
That's such a good point. That's awesome. Well, thank you so much for sharing your story with us. Again, I think it's still relevant Of course, and I think a lot of people can learn a lot from this. But before we let you go, where can people find you if they want to connect with you outside of the podcast?
Eddie Carrillo 35:37
Yeah. Really on the millennial Mental Health Channel, social media pages. Twitter, Instagram, Tik Tok, Justin's the one that posted tick tock, his face is easier to look at than mine. It's all at millennial MHC. Two l's and two n's very important. We had a hard time spelling millennial. When we first started the show, I will admit that our first logo was actually misspelled and nobody told us. So we figured that out later. So yeah, we're on all this those social medias. You can email us millennialmhchannel@gmail.com. You can find us wherever you find your podcasts. Yeah, feel free to check us out. We we like to just talk a lot about like, I think we've shifted a lot to more like current things that happened mental health wise, but we do sometimes focus on like specific diagnoses and things like that. So I'm really happy with what we've been able to put together almost over the almost last three years with Justin. So yeah, thank you guys, again, for letting me plug that
Allie Joy 36:46
Of course. And we'll link it all in the show notes too, so that there's no spelling errors just go into the description wherever you're listening and you can click on it right there. So don't worry about spelling. Perfect. Awesome. Well, thank you again so much, Eddie.
Kathryn Esquer 37:03
And that's it. The OG bad therapists Allie and Kathryn are signing off for the week.
Allie Joy 37:09
Make sure to subscribe and leave us a review. We pick a few lucky five server viewers to shout out and invite for a 15 minute consultation with the both of us to talk about anything on your mind. From clinical work to podcasting we're game. Just make sure to leave us your name and location in the review.
Kathryn Esquer 37:25
And are you a bad therapist and want to join us on the show? Go to abadtherapist.com and tell us your story.
Allie Joy 37:34
Our podcast is produced and edited by my amazing husband Austin Joy. He also created the music for our intro and outro you can find this song along with many others on any music platform under the artist Air Force effect. And if you're a bad therapist, starting your own podcast, contact Austin for his full suite of podcast and sound production services. You can find him on Instagram @Air For Effect.
Kathryn Esquer 37:58
And don't forget, were all bad therapists.